Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Emma who subsisted a good, long time on bananas. Ripe bananas. Green bananas. Small bananas. Lean bananas. She ate SO many bananas that one day she woke up and decided that she’d had enough bananas to last the rest of her entire life… and quite possibly even through the rest of her next three incarnations. She was DONE with bananas. Strangely enough, it happened at approximately the same time she discovered the wonder that is Cheerios. Crunchy. Stale. Smashed. No matter. They were all the same to little Emma. She wanted Cheerios first thing in the morning with milk. Then she wanted dry Cheerios for snack. She’d Hoover the Cheerios from the floor and bury them in the hollows of her pockets for a nice surprise later while watching The Upside Down Show. But true to form, she grew tired of the Cheerios as well. Her food weariness could always be predicted by her mother. It occurred the second she’d tire of running to the grocery store every other day for more fetish food and would finally decide to buy three family-size crates of whatever Emma’s latest addiction was. That was ALWAYS when Emma would surrender to the utter realization that said food wasn’t as awe-inspiring as she’d once believed.
After short-lived infatuations with cheese, bread, sausage, Saltines and antibiotics, Emma eventually made her way back to fruit, settling on red grapes. At 6 AM sharp, she’d lift her sleepy, cherubic face up to her mother and say, “I’m dry!” Then immediately add, “I want grapes!” At the end of the day as they were driving home from day care, she’d sing an “I Love Grapes” song to the tune of “Three Blind Mice.” She’d refuse noodles and fish sticks. Stuffing and esparagus. Wendy's and KFC… Nothing could satiate Emma’s appetite the way that a pile of red grapes could. NOTHING.
Then one day, her mother was sifting through the newspaper and saw that red grapes were on sale at the local grocery store….
To be continued…..
Sounds like she's stock piling vitamins :)
ReplyDeleteI have a littel girl who is a very frustrating eater too - I am at a lost and feel for you on the entire matter of feeding children.
ReplyDeleteTo be continued?
ReplyDeleteAre you trying to drive me mad, woman?
I love grapes myself.
I had a daughter like this, although she did eat a few more things. She is rather the same to this day and still won't touch tomatoes. She use to take ten minutes to get her taco ready to eat, getting the tomatoes out. She even went through a phase where she dumped it all out on her plate and just ate the meat. I tried not to worry-all my children remained healthy.
ReplyDeleteMmmmm. Grapes. I hate this time of year for many reasons, but one of the most important is that grapes cost upwards of $3 a pound. I can't wait for the sales to commence (and for your story to continue).
ReplyDeleteI followed your link from Scribbit. I loved your comment about the NPR reporters. I'm an NPR addict and I think their names are hilarious (great job on spelling them all!) Have you ever looked their photos up on the internet? Some of them look exactly like you'd expect, but others....not so much. The first time I saw the Diane Rehm photo I was totally surprised.