I hear we are less than 24 hours before takeoff. So bring your friends, your popcorn, your Chianti and your opinions over to Mile High Mamas. Because I do believe I will be saving my best Jonah-got-a-rock-stuck-in-his-ear kind of stories for this new gig. And nobody with a living, breathing sense of humor would willingly miss those.
Allow me to share a sampling of some Jonah conversation from earlier today:
Just after school-
"I think I've known Andres all my life."
"ALL your life?"
"Yes."
"That would mean you would have known him for seven years now, son."
"Yeah, I know."
"That would mean he was in Guymon, Oklahoma back in the year 2000, son."
"Uh-huh."
"You still think you've known him all your life?"
"Yeah, but I don't think HE knows."
After dinner-
"I'm glad I'm not a gull."
"Why? What's wrong with being a girl?"
"I wouldn't want people cutting my stomach open. EVUH."
"Not all girls get their stomachs cut open. Mine was only cut open because I couldn't give birth naturally."
"What's nachully?"
Toni chiming in: It's when a lady pretty much poops out her baby!
[A look of utter terror] "Oh. my. GOD!!!!" [And then he was on the floor convulsing like someone who's just been told women poop babies.]
Toni: Okay, NOW you can be glad you're not a girl.
Just before bedtime-
"Mom, can I wead The Violent Wabbit to you?"
[Inspecting the book in his hand] "No, but you can read me The VELVETEEN Rabbit."
"Awww. Why not the violent one??"
"Because nobody's written that one yet, son. And, with any luck at all, they never ever will."
So for the sake of honesty, I should probably mention that the MHM posts won't ALL be about Jonah. There will be plenty of Kyra is Bizarrely Like a Puppy stories and Emma Is A Foodie stories and Toni Doesn't Need Teeth stories. But Jonah is my only son. And, well, just as good a marketing tool as any.
There will actually be plenty of good entertainment from other Colorado writers as well. And don't EVEN get me started on the message boards. I MUST post soon about my "fans."
SO. See you there??
I am THERE. And am so glad you are, too!
ReplyDeleteWHAT? Are you kidding me??? The Violent Rabbit? There is most DEFINITELY a story to be told there! ;)
ReplyDeleteThe pooping baby story rocks.
ReplyDeleteI need to go check you out in your new digs...the preview has me wanting more!
ReplyDeleteI'm trying valiantly not to wake sleeping children. But oh my god is Jonah hilarious!!
ReplyDeleteI can't wait to hear more!
ReplyDeleteI love your kids, even before meeting them!
ReplyDeleteAnd ... Guymon, OK????? My dad was born there, and I spent the first 4 years of my life on a farm there!! I was born in Perryton. After that OK, I lived in Salida, if I didn't tell you that before. Lawdy, can this world get any smaller???