A couple of things first... I'm keeping my last slideshow post up, but I took off the music so as not to give you legitimate reasons for avoiding my blog. I think it's quite enough that I occasionally wave my liberal flag in the faces of my conservative friends. Secondly, happy new year! I forgot to say that to you in my last post. But I was tired, you see. As it turned out, there was nothing "simple" about putting up a simple slideshow. I'm not even joking when I say that I dedicated the first two and a half days of the new year to POSTERITY. Do you know what two and a half solid days on a computer does to a slideshow ignoramuse's shoulders? It makes them morph into grumpy old men who SCREAM with annoyance at any and all movement. They even scream with annoyance at NO movement, come to think of it.
So my new year's resolutions go something like this:
1. Leave things like slideshows to those people smart enough to own a Mac.
OR
2. Learn the art of massaging your own shoulders because a) two-hour massages are pricey and b) there are no offers that my family members can't refuse in exchange for a little deep shoulder rubdown for a few hours. NADA.
OR
3. Screw Posterity in the form of technology.
AND
3.5. Get busy with the photo album thing, the old fashioned kind with sticky pages and cutesy captions and definitely no musical genres to sift through with esoteric lyrics to ANALYZE.
So I started the new year and already I'm learning. Lesson One: If you want a powerpoint presentation on the benefits of nutrient management, I'm your gal! But I SUCK at musical photo slideshows. This is a nice little segue into what I had ORIGINALLY planned to post about which is a list of random things that I learned in the last year.
1. Kyra will allow me to meticulously apply lotion to her face after a bath because she "wikes" me.
2. She also tolerates cold weather, hand-me-downs, the Boomerang channel, and most of Emma's bossiness.
3. But NOT leaving the library. That's just going a bit too far.
4. Emma doesn't like spaghetti anymore.
5. But only after the first serving.
5. She'll put up with it after seconds and thirds.
6. She's not a huge fan of dance class, either. Not like Kyra.
7. But she'll withhold complaining if you promise her a pile of bacon and potatoes afterwards. And maybe swimming.
8. They unwittingly believe that they are twins.
9. What this means is that I have to go out and buy a scarf for ONE if I casually and unthinkingly give an unused scarf to the OTHER.
10. Speaking of scarves, Toni doesn't like them.
11. Or hats. Or gloves. Or WINTERWARE for that matter.
12. Who cares that we live in one of the coldest places in the continental US, that stuff is damned ugly!
13. But she has great taste in friends and they can come trash my house any day.
14. Although, I have to quit offering slumber parties in exchange for straight As.
15. Because Jonah has a hard enough time avoiding the estrogen he's surrounded by already.
16. And when the DVD player is broken and your mother doesn't have cable and these GIRLS are taking over the computer, one has to resort to things like READING and... well... god forbid such nonsense take place while on vacation.
17. Did I mention I can't do a musical slideshow in under two days?
18. And that I'm lucky?
19. And I can't fly fish.
20. I have a love/hate relationship with Stephenie Meyer books.
21. I can survive a salmonella-in-the-water outbreak.
22. And, evidently, another year of living two hours away from my husband.
23. But only barely. Like, right now its kinda iffy. My shoulders are SCREAMING for him.
24. Winking politicians give me the eebie-jeebies.
25. And I'm capable of reading AT LEAST 32 books in one year. You have no idea how huge this is. Last year I thought 18 was something to brag about.
26. I'd watch Mama Mia again. No, seriously.
27. I'd procrastinate all over again for Obama.
28. No more cutting my hair in contemporary styles. Contemporary haircuts are for the ambitious and the hot iron savvy. Neither of which are me.
29. No more raffles tickets in my future.
30. And definitely no more all-nighters on a desktop. (But all the rules change if, you know, a laptop miraculously sneaks into my life.)
So what did you learn last year?
5 strokes of genius:
What a cool post!
I laughed when I read of Toni's aversion to winter warmth-providing clothing! Even if I didn't know, that would tell me her approximate age. I remember when it was not cool to be warm as it just looked dorky. LOL!
Poor boy-child. My nephew could commiserate with him. Nephew and wife have 4 girls, and part of his email addy is "521" because he always is outnumbered! He's even tried "boy dogs" but that doesn't help, he claims.
I wish you a happy full new year with a laptop, maybe even a Mac! I love mine!
I loved the movie Momma Mia and have seen it twice. I'm through with James Bond movies though-even though the new James is a hunk. Thought it was very boring.
I learned friends are everything and no connection should be left to wither.
I learned that it can only get better... 2008 bit rocks, so...
Whew, you learned a whole lot! I don't know if I could do Mama Mia again though it was really cute. I have been in a brain funk for weeks...I am not sure if I learned anything last year or not! Maybe when the gray skies turn to Spring I will have thoughts again.
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